Wednesday, May 7, 2008

A Doozy Of A Day!!


Alarm goes off at 6:15 this morning and I roll over and hit the's Wednesday and Pizza Day at school. That means I can sleep in an extra 9 minutes per my snooze alarm since I don't have to pack is going to be a good day.

Uh oh...snag in my plan. Forgot it was field trip day for the eight year old and that means bag lunch. Unfortunately, I didn't remember this little detail until 3 minutes before we were supposed to be out the door. Okay, no big deal, tossed in some toast, go-gurt, apples, cheezits, Nugo bar (hey that's nutrition!)and a juice box. Okay, now we are ready to leave...let the dogs out...wait! What's wrong with Pepi's eye? It's huge! okay, quick! grab him and put him in the car, will call the vet on the way to school.

Head out the door...shoot! Where's the three year old's shoes?! In a dream world, they would be neatly tucked away in the shoe bench in the mudroom...oh, that's right! forgot that after bathtime last night, the three year old wanted to dress himself. That meant no clothes whatsoever but good thing he put on his winter hat and shoes! Okay, I'll just carry him to the car...45 pound 3 year old under one arm, 6 pound Chihuahua, open mug of coffee, juice cup, purse, keys under the other arm. No Problem! I can handle this...wait... "hey 8 year old...where's your jacket?! Yes, You NEED a jacket! take my keys and unlock the door, don't forget to turn off light and lock the door...and if you find three year old's shoes...."

Okay in car...rushing down our gravel road, to just get to main road which leads down hill, just to another road that takes us to town (yes, we live on a mountain!)...HIT EVERY SINGLE STOPLIGHT crossing town. @#$*!!!!

stop light

Pull into school parkinglot at 2 minutes before morning assembly - "Quick! out of the car!! I did too come to a complete stop! Loveyou-haveagoodday-bye!"

Call vet- no answer - leave urgent message about Pepito. Now at stoplight where train tracks are. Three year old pipes up in backseat (nearly forgot I had him!) "where's the train...? Is the train coming Mommy? I don't see the train Mommy! Is it coming?"

Now I read that we are supposed to answer our children's questions with clear explanations, so I try ..."No, the lights would be flashing and the red & white striped rails would be down if a train was coming."


I try again..."if a train was coming the poles would be down and the lights would be flashing."


sigh..."No, the lights aren't flashing."


deep breath....."Train's Broken!"

"Why's it broken? is it gonna get fixed, Mommy? who's gonna fix it? who broke the train, Mommy....?" etc.


Call vet again..get appointment for 11 a.m. Great! Ten minutes later vet calls to confirm that I CANCELED my 11:00 appt. WHat?! "we got your message on machine that you want to cancel your appt." What?! I didn't even have an appointment to cancel until 10 minutes ago! I need my appointment!"...sigh..things aren't looking good...

Get home to find 8 year old left all lights on and door unlocked...sigh...

Okay still have about 2 hours to do housework until vet appointment...Hahahahahahahaha! not so easy with a 6 pound chihuahua wrapped up in a baby blanket under one arm and a tempermental 3 year old insisting that it's okay to eat oreo's for breakfast...and lunch.

Take Pepi to vet - feel ridiculously claustrophobic in exam room. Could it be the sterile, entirely white, brick room with bars on windows? Now, if I was trying hard not to pass out - just in anticipation, can you imagine how the animals feel? Nearly cry while Vet removes obnoxiously large foxtail from my little Chihuahua's eye! Poor guy. Ointment 3x day for 10 days. No sunlight! My usually active dog is reduced to this little shivering baby who just wants to be cuddled all day.

Come home to give bath to other puppy, Daisy, to make sure no evil fox tails lurking in her longer, shaggier fur. Easily a 10 minute job, right?...BUT ...remember I have a three year old? I had no sooner removed the dog collar to find the three year old had moved a chair (now why is it that when you ask them to pick up their toys, get their shirt/shoes/jacket etc. on, that becomes an enormous task that takes 20 minutes that most likely YOU end up completeing -but in the blink of an eye, a three year old can somehow manuever a kitchen chair from across the room when he wants to get at hidden halloween candy in an upper cabinet or in this case "help" me wash the dog?) INSISTING that he be the one working the faucet already know how that must of turned out...will skip over details and just say I never knew washing a 5 pound puppy would require a mop, 4 bath towels and a change of clothes for both of us.

Oh, look! Time to get kids from school...hmm...Pepi's injured, Daisy just got a bath, don't want them rolling in dirt, can't trust them in house alone...I know! I will take them with us in the car! So pile in three year old and two dogs. Have to pull over enroute to school while Daisy our 5 month old puppy, throws up in the front seat........those baby wipes are so versatile!

Get kids, drive home slllooooowly avoiding all bumps in road in fear of upsetting puppy's stomach again, listening to kids day of "she said to so & so that so & so said..." (just picture Charlie Brown's teacher talking to him "wawa wa wawawaaa wa" ). ... doing my best '''umm...oh, I see...really..?"

No sooner had I removed my jacket, hung up my keys, took care of dogs AND carried in the now sleeping, 45 pound three year old, with the only thing keeping me going was me fantasizing about a gigantic cup of tea and a blankie when.....

"Moooommmmmmmm! I'm hungry!" "Moooommmm, what did YOU do with MY bookreport?" "Mooooooommmm he's hitting me!" "Mooommmmmm, She's in MY room!"

And it's only 4 p.m.....Can I cry yet..?
Mother's Day better be gooooood this year! :)


Anonymous said...

lol!!!! I am sorry for laughing because your day sounded anything but funny. I am sorry I can't help it.
Big hugs to you.....I guess that's why God made Mom's ..Where would the world be without them. We are the only one's that can multi-task, run on no sleep, find things that WE LOST, comfort a sad heart, calm a fussy child, feed those empty bellies, etc, etc, etc.......365 days a year!!! Mother's day should be at least a week long celebration.
Hope you day is less hectic and the doggies feel better, Janie

Carole said...

Hello !
I just found your blog ; I can relate, though I don't have dogs (just guinea pigs and rabbits).
Good luck and hope your dog will feel better. Oh and by the way, I looked it up in the dictionnary but couldn't find it : what's fox tail ?

Laurie - Decorating Fanatic said...

Hello! Fox tail are these long tan colored sharp,barbed weeds that we have over here in CA. They usually get stuck in your socks when you go walking through the fields. Sometimes they can get so embedded in your socks you can't get them out! quite painful! But thanks for commenting and yes, he is doing much better! :)

JoAnne said...

Thanks for a much needed laugh! Your story was just so entertaining and I could relate to every last word. You deserve a GREAT Mother's Day! JoAnne

Donna Lynn said...

Poor Laurie!
I am laughing though, not at you, just at the fact that this has happened to me sooooo many times! My two boys were absolute nightmares, like twin train wreaks!
You will get through it, you will live, you will have hair left after pulling it out, you will have your life back to normal, (what ever that is after raising kids!), all will be peaceful soon! I promise!
I will be lifting you up to God each day Laurie, you are on my heart so much as I go through my day!
Big Mom to Mom hugs, Donna Lynn

Picket said...

Girl I feel your pain..but I am still laughing so hard..I need a hankie! lol Ohhhh your day sounds like a normal day to me what you complaining about! lol lol I had five kids and I could make a hit comedy movie from some of our days! lol lol Hey that's an idea girl...keep all these notes and write a book...we will need some entertainment to read in the Old Folks Home! lol lol Hope the furbaby's eye heals quick! Have a great evening!

Kim Hardt Originals said...

Happy Mother's Day early. You have to have a wonderful Mother's Day after that kind of day.

Too funny Laurie!

Picket said...

Morning girl....this is a new day and it's Friday!!!! Hope you have a fantastic Mother's day weekend!!!

twintoo10292 said...

Not many of of could have gone thru such a day with such grace and humor. Remember tomorrow is your day...sounds like you've earned a great one. Twin

Heather said...

Just found your blog and I love it! This post had me cracking up to the point of tears! I can relate! I have a 2 year old and one that is almost 4- no school agers yet so I am sure that is an adventure in the wings. The way you write is fantastic and gave me a good laugh knowing I am not the only mom that goes through these days wanting to cry or rip out my hair! I feel normal now.
-Heather :)

Heather said...

P.S. I remember your house from RMS- it is beautiful!

Ahr Family Properties said...

This is my first time to your blog, and I dont have one, I havent jumped on that train yet, but I have to say that was the best blog I have ever read. You are a fantastic writer!! Erma Bombeck (rest her soul) eat your heart out!! Have you ever considered a career in writing? I will definitely bookmark your blog to come back again!

Merici Trujillo said...

Omg LMAO!!!! Lorena!!!!!! This was so funny! I had a visual of your whole day and wanted to keep reading it (I HATE reading btw). I love how you got right to the point and kept it rolling with one funny problem after another! KEEP WRITING, you have a real gift!

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